The SEC: To most investors, these letters represent one thing. However, to others, they represent the Swan Enforcement Commission.
After the state commission put out its big swan alert, I was on guard. I woke up the other morning expecting to see 2,000 large white birds on my lawn and pond. Scared to leave on a quiet walk, I secured my mace and stun gun to protect myself from an unwanted assault with memories of Hitchcock’s “The Birds.” Fortunately, they had moved on to another unprotected area of the state.
These large, man-eating birds may carry deadly Lyme disease and are probably rabid as well. How many of our pets and children must be carried off before we must do something to protect them?
Really? This commission has moved us to the ridiculous. Perhaps the person responsible for wanting to reduce the swan population had a bad childhood experience, like stepping in swan poop. My suggestion is to spend more taxpayer money on finding a use for the tons of goose poop that I find on my lawn every morning. Imagine a Nobel Prize for chemistry for the commission officer who can turn goose poop into fuel that can power cars or contribute to our economic revival. If not, this should be their swan song.
Mike Ferber, Greenport